Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Fantasy Baseball Survival Tips for the Wise

The secrets to playing in a fantasy baseball league while maintaining your sanity and keeping everyone around you from wanting to kill you are simple. They are, in order:

  1. Do not talk to anyone who is not in your fantasy baseball league about your fantasy team for more then fifteen seconds, maximum. It is permissible to admit you are playing fantasy baseball, and in the unlikely event that your team name is actually funny (Note: "Nelson Cruz For President", "Feel the Bernie Brewers" and "Ben Zobrist Ghazi" are not, in fact, funny) you can mention the name. Once. To go beyond these firm limits is to risk inducing permanent brain lock in any soul unfortunate enough to hear you. And yes, this includes your spouse/partner. Especially your spouse/partner.

Sunday, March 27, 2016

On Tanking And The Dream

There's been a lot of fretful talk about "tanking" in baseball in a way that there hasn't necessarily been in other sports. I mean, sure the tire fire that is the Philadelphia 76ers has excited some notice, but only because they've been at it for so long to such little effect. But all of a sudden this year it's baseball's bete noire, the scourge that's sweeping the land and must be stopped so someone can Think About The Children.

(Everything in baseball is about The Children. This sentiment is usually evinced by middle aged men. I leave the irony as an exercise for the student.)

Thursday, March 24, 2016

What Your Choice of Pittsburgh Penguins Jersey Is Really Saying For You

NHL replica hockey jerseys are expensive.

Hockey used to have a real working-class ethic in the US; historically when someone says "hockey fan" they think of a guy missing a couple of teeth who has to get up early to unload railcars or something, when in fact there are a lot more NHL fans who look like Margot Robbie than you would imagine.

Tuesday, March 22, 2016

On Adam LaRoche's Daycare Issues

I do not know who said what to whom in the Affair Of The Banished 14 Year Old on Chicago's South Side, nor do I much care. 

Monday, March 14, 2016

So How Did We Do?

Yesterday, we made some predictions about the NCAA tournament bracket. Let's see how we did, accuracy-wise:

  • St. Mary's and Monmouth got jobbed out of berths, and Wichita State got tossed into a "First Four" game. Meanwhile, questionable major conference selections like Syracuse, Michigan (both of which we called out) and Vanderbilt got in.

Saturday, March 12, 2016

Things You Will See On Selection Sunday

We at Sportsthodoxy boldly predict the following things will happen when the NCAA Men's Basketball tournament seedings are announced:

  • A deserving mid-major that lost in their conference tournament (Wichita State, Monmouth, St. Mary's - pick one) will get jobbed out of a bid that is instead awarded to a less impressive major conference team (Syracuse, Michigan, South Carolina - pick one?).

On Goose Gossage Getting Steamed

The general reaction to Goose Gossage's off-color, off-topic (he'd initially been asked about Aroldis Chapman) rant about Joey Bats and Bryce Harper and all those disrespectful younger players is "cranky old man yells at damn kids to get off his lawn."

I don't think this is the most accurate way of looking at it.

Tuesday, March 08, 2016

The Endless Debate

Things that are more likely than anyone coming to a satisfactory resolution on the "where does Peyton Manning rank among quarterbacks all time?" sports talk radio debate:

Saturday, March 05, 2016

Staaled Out

To quote a video game a friend of mine wrote, do you want to know what the definition of insanity is? Roughly speaking, it's trying to win year after year with the same core of "stars" that has failed to make the playoffs in ages.