Sunday, December 20, 2015

Color Rush Is A Crime Against Nature

Worst. Minions. Cosplay. Ever. 
Listen carefully.

There is a word for the new "color rush" uniforms the NFL made the Rams and Bucs wear Thursday night.


That word is "pajamas".

I realize that sports leagues have to regularly come up with new and exciting uniform variants in order to milk every last nickel out of the guys who already have the last six variant jerseys.

But.

Putting large men in bright yellow head to toe, especially with those shoes, made the Rams look like the worst collective Minions cosplay ever. And the Bucs? They looked like they were wearing old-timey red flannels, complete with button-up butt flap that Bugs Bunny was inevitably going to shove some high explosives into 2/3 of the way through the cartoon.

So, NFL, please, I beg you. Cut it out already. Is it not enough that you're extracting a half a billion dollars from the good people of Missouri in order to maybe keep the Rams in town? You have to make them look like they escaped from Gru's basement?

And five bucks says the Eagles and the Jets' version of this nonsense is sponsored by Vlasic. Or Dr. Bruce Banner.
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