EAGLES MAKE SURPRISE MOVE, CUT TIM TEBOW.
No. Let me fix that for you.
EAGLES CUT THIRD STRING QUARTERBACK WHO WAS OUT OF THE LEAGUE LAST YEAR AND WAS MOSTLY HORRIBLE DURING THE PRESEASON, EXCEPT AGAINST THE JETS, AND FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, THEY'RE THE JETS. MATT CASSEL, MATT FLYNN, AND NUMEROUS OTHER QBS CUT BY OTHER TEAMS OFFER PRECISELY ZERO SYMPATHY. AND WHEN BILL BELICHICK AND CHIP KELLY, THE NFL'S EQUIVALENT OF DR. JEKYLL AND RICK SANCHEZ FROM RICK AND MORTY, DECIDE THEY CAN'T DO ANYTHING WITH YOU, THEN YOU SHOULD PROBABLY BE LOOKING AT EITHER THE CFL OR ESPN.
There. That's better.
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