Quick, loyal readers! What's the dumbest thing to happen in sports in the last 24 or so hours? Was it:
A)The publication of the first Top 25 rankings for the 2016-2017 college basketball season before they've finished mopping up the spilled Rita's and squished Tastykakes on Nova's campus from Monday night's win?
B)Jays manager John Gibbons reacting to a call against one of his players (specifically, Jose Bautista's attempt to give Rays 2B Logan Forsythe a soothing calf massage while Forsythe was trying to turn a game-ending double play) with a blubbery rant about how the new slide rules were wussing up the game.
C)Sports talking heads - who spent the year bemoaning the lack of a "dominating" team in men's college basketball - debating if UConn's unprecedented run of dominance in women's hoops is "bad for the game".
D)ESPN's idiotic Greg Hardy interview, which had the look and feel of one of those infomercials Ross Perot bought in prime time when was running for president and trying to convince the country that he was not in fact Billionaire Gollum.
E)Diamondbacks manager Chip Hale, who went ballistic after an opening-game shellacking, calling out reporters for daring to have been excited about a team that added two frontline starters in the offseason and was clearly positioning itself to contend.
F)Umpire Dana DeMuth telling fielders to go ahead and peg runners who are out of the baseline, because that crap worked so well in elementary school when we were all playing wall ball at recess.
G)Cavaliers owner Dan Gilbert, one of the architects of the great mortgage crisis of 2007, demanding more public money to upgrade Quicken Loans Arena because...err...you got me. He just wants more money, presumably so he can spend it on whatever offensively limited big man LeBron James decides he needs around this week.