Sunday, June 14, 2015

In the Wake of the Triple Crown

Not actually American Pharoah. Either of them.
It has now been one week since American Pharoah won horse racing's triple crown, the first horse to do so in an exceedingly long time. This singular event, like the long-awaited Mayweather-Pacquiao bout, was supposed to breathe life into a sport that has slipped steadily away from the limelight over the past couple of decades, and indeed, it did briefly wash up against the shores of the national sports conversation.

But that was a week ago. Since then, we've had NBA Finals basketball, NHL finals hockey (which no one is talking about either), various baseball games played, the usual nonsense about NFL players threatening to hold out, and someone shaking their head sadly about Tiger Woods, because there's always someone shaking their head sadly about Tiger Woods. Which means, that in that last week, you have probably forgotten everything you knew or heard about horse racing and the Triple Crown, all of which you were cocktail-party up on last week. Doubt me? See if you can remember:

  1. The name of American Pharoah's owner
  2. The name of American Pharoah's trainer
  3. The name of American Phar0ah's jockey
  4. The # of years it had been since the last time a horse had won the Triple Crown
  5. The name of any of the other horses in any of the other Triple Crown Races. Any of them. (Bonus points if you can name one that's not Frosting, or Frozen, or Fibula, or whatever the one that was supposed to steal the Belmont was)
  6. The length of the Belmont in miles
  7. The actual name of the Belmont
  8. The definition of "furlong", and why anyone should actually care
  9. The betting odds on American Pharoah on race day
  10. Any of American Pharoah's ancestors. No points for saying "a horse".

If you nailed all 10 of these, congratulations. You are probably a horse yourself.
If you got 7-9, you may in fact be working for the local OTB outlet, or perhaps Big Hay.
4-6, and you've got better awareness of horse racing than 99% of the American public.
1-3 means you're probably a Patriots fan and want to know why all the horses aren't named "Gronk".
0 means...well it means you probably wrote this. And no, I'm not providing the answers.

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